A dream~

Your face
your eyes
your shadow
your voice
especially
your smile...

free birds flying on the skies
blue sky and clear clouds
and a beautiful you right beside me
although we are walking on a busy streets
car hons everywhere and ppl making noises
in such crowded and noisy place
I still feel peace
harmony
and most importantly
LOVE

to me
you're everything
without you
i'm liveless
because of you, I worked hard for our future
I gave you everything and make sure you're satisfied with all of it
I know you loved me like no one else too

yet..
You left me one day
I called you
I came to your house and find you
I even stopped working
but you never even pick up my calls
even if you pass by me
you didn't say hello as if i'm transparent
you have been treating me the same for 2 years
long enough that my heart are crushed into dust

then
I found out that you're getting married with someone
I cried out for 2 days long
I hide outside your wedding ceremony
looking at you
I missed that smile you gave me
and now you gave that smile to the person you're marrying
I'm jealous
angry
and I cried once again
I dare not continue to watch it
so I left

Rain falls as I walked out
As if god is crying for me
I walked and cried under the rain
as I pass by the graves near the church
I decided to drop by my mom for a visit
I told me mom everything
Life's so unfair
and you left me without a word
out of sudden, a lightning strike right beside me and it hits someone's grave
I approach the grave
and I saw
my name on the rock
and I just found out
I was actually dead for 2 years already..

my hearts stopped beating
I was actually dead? I couldn't believe it!
so everything happened makes sense!
I was transparent after all
she couldn't see me
she couldn't even hear my outcry..
suddenly I got a flashback on what happened:

I was involved in a car accident
a car banged me from behind with a speed of more than 120km/h
I couldn't even feel the pain
Immediately I died
and yet I dreamt that I was walking home
along with the presents I bought for an exchange of your smile..
you cried right beside my bed when I was gone
everyday
every single second
your face is always full of tears..

I'm sorry my dear
now I know everything is just a dream..
I am happy
that you finally gain back the smile and really smile like the usual you
I am happy
that you found someone that can replace the dead me
because I can no longer take care of you..
I have been awake for 2 years in this dream
and now
its time for me to rest in this dream..
This is the very first and the very last time I'm saying it to you,
I love you my dear~
and goodbye~

As soon as I fall back into 'sleep'
her tears starts falling although she's smiling so happily..
Today
22nd March
is your wedding
is also my death anniversary